Despedida de Soltera

I first traveled alone when I was twelve years old. My parents sent me to Guatemala for a month to visit my family. I remember my mom being very nervous and both of us having to drum up the courage to make it look like what I was doing was very normal. My family and everyone I met in Guatemala keep saying how brave and adventurous I was for travelling alone. Ever since that trip, I have had to drum up the same courage every time I embark on a new journey: leaving to Wisconsin for college, moving to Washington, D.C. and then New York, my trips to Europe and now my adventures in Southeast Asia. In some ways, despite the bumps in the road, it has always been easy leaving, but I have always felt like I was keeping a secret. One side of me has always felt very confident and secure about my travels and my decisions, but until recently I did not realize that some of that drummed up courage was forced and that I had kept this as a secret even from myself. It was as if I needed to keep a strong face so that no one would question my decisions and so that no one would worry about me. I started to realize this in New York, but it did not hit me until I arrived in New Delhi. I booked my trip to India while I was still in the states and purposely booked it for a longer stay than Bridget because I could not see myself visiting India without seeing the Taj Mahal. After spending two weeks cuddled and cradled in Bangalore, I left to northern India to visit the golden triangle, which includes Delhi, Agra and Jaipur. I was not excited about traveling alone, particularly in India, but my trip was booked and I either flew back to Thailand without seeing the Taj, or I drummed up the courage to accomplish what I had set out to do months before.

I arrived in New Delhi on a Thursday morning without a hotel reservation, or any idea of how I would get around. I simply placed my bets on figuring it out when I got to the airport. I had done some research online and read a bit from my Lonely Planet book, but for some reason, it was not making sense. In Cambodia, Carla and I simply winged it, and it worked. This time, however, flying solo seemed to throw me out of whack. In my head, no matter how much I read, Delhi seemed like this massive mush that I could not get my head around.

It was only a four day solo trip, and although I have travelled alone for weeks at a time, I was not prepared for my emotional breakdown in Delhi. There were a few mishaps that propelled the break down which included a canceled credit card due to fraud, an expired debit card that contained my emergency funds, a bank that did not know where the new debit card was, and dwindling cash flow. All I could think was, “how the heck am I going to pay for my hotel tomorrow morning?” I have been in more pressing situations in the past, and everything except that hotel night was paid for, but I think this situation represented something bigger for me. I realized that I was done traveling alone and I was done trying to be courageous.

By morning, mom and dad came to the rescue. I had called my dad the night before and I literally could not get the words out “I need $30 to pay for my hotel.” All the credit and debit card mishaps did not matter. The bottom line was that I was asking my dad for $30 and it hurt more than anything I can remember. It was then, and now as I write, that I realize how tough and strong I have been trying to be for so long. This toughness has served me well in my thirty years of life. I am grateful and honor my efforts, but the universe could not have sent a clearer message. No matter how successful, all my tiring efforts at trying to do it alone, with no help, may no longer be the best option anymore.

Having arrived at the decision that this was my last trip alone, I decided to really enjoy the four days to the fullest. It took some work to sit with my new outlook on life. The new outlook is, “It doesn’t need to be so hard, you don’t have to be so tough, and it’s OK to ask for help.” With this realization, I dubbed my trip “mi despedida de soltera.” In Spanish, this phrase refers to a farewell to the single life for women that are going to be married, which is also known as the bachelorette party in English. Now, I am not announcing that I am getting married, but I am announcing that I am done with the old and ready for the new. My “despedida de soltera,” or my good-bye to going at it alone, seemed to be the most appropriate phrase to capture my four day trip in northern India.

Pyramid Valley

Friends! I have just returned to Bangkok from a spectacular three week adventure in India. As I mentioned before, Bridget and I embarked on our India adventure together and enjoyed our stay with Anita. Anita is retired, and nearly two yeas ago, left her super powerful business life behind in San Diego and ventured into a 24/7 spiritual journey that includes daily meditation. For these reasons, Bridget and I were excited about coming to India and learning more about meditation through Anita.

We wasted no time diving into meditation. On our first day Anita took us to Pyramid Valley just two hours south of Bangalore. The main attraction at the Pyramid Valley campus is the Maitreya-Buddha Pyramid which stands 104 feet tall and can hold up to 5,000 persons inside. The main purpose of visiting the pyramid is to meditate. During different times of the year, communal meditation sessions and retreats take place. According to the Pyramid Valley website, an enourmous amount of energy is stored within pyramid structures, which makes it a much more powerful meditation experience. Two-thirds up from the base of the pyramid is a platform where anyone can sit and meditate. Meditating at this level is said to increase healing energy and alter one's state of consciousness.

Before learning about this and not really knowing the purpose and effects of pyramid meditation, Bridget and I willingly and happily went for the two hour drive to Pyramid Valley simply because Anita suggested it. We learned that our blind faith in Anita paid off as we all had quite an interesting experience during the pyramid meditation. I have been meditating for nearly four years now and enjoy it very much, but my meditation at Pyramid Valley was different than other experience. During my meditation, I literally felt like I was being cradled in two enormous arms. I knew that I was in the pyramid physically, but during the meditation I was very far away. I experienced a number of other things, but being cradled was by far the most unique effect. Because I was aware of my physical body lying on the pyramid platform, and because I felt like I was floating, I decided to come back just in case something was wrong and make sure that the platform wasn't about to collapse. I started to come back by feeling the cement ground with my hands, then the metal railing. I opened my eyes and confirmed that the platform was definitely NOT moving. I was relieved but more excited about going back into the meditation and floating once again.

Anita and Bridget also felt a unique sensation during their meditation. Anita felt like she was floating and Bridget felt like she was experiencing a mini earth-quake. Bridget wasn't convinced, and Anita had to show Bridget that the platform was made of cement and not suspended by cables. As we left the pyramid, Anita spoke to one of the staffers and was informed that the floating sensation was the soul rejoicing and speaking to us. How happy I was to learn that my soul simply wanted to cuddle.

I recorded a clip right after the experience and I have included it below. I am also sharing pictures of the pyramid and the road trip to the pyramid campus. If you are interested in learning more about Pyramid Valley and the positive effects of meditation, please visit http://pyramidvalley.org/home.htm

Pyramid Valley

Curry in a Hurry

Friends! It's been too long. India has been wonderfully amazing. I travelled from Bangkok to Bangalore with my friend Bridget. We first met in Washington, DC. nearly four years ago. Bridget and I have not seen each other in about two years and during that time we did not keep a tight phone or email connection, but each communication was solid and meaningful enough to bring us together in India. During one of our phone conversations, Bridget shared that she was meant to come to India and I could not help but ask if I could join her. Sharing this time with Bridget has been a gift in itself. We are staying with her very good friend Anita. They are powerful women and it has been a true blessing sharing the last nine days with them. Although Anita and I have just met for the first time, the three of us built a tight circle almost immediately. They are both warm, loving, accpeting, strong, intelligent women, and I feel so very lucky to be surrounded with so much positive love, light and energy every day.

Through Anita, Bridget and I have met many wonderful friends, all on a spiritual path and part of Anita's spiritual family in Bangalore. Thanks to Anita, we have indulged in delicious home cooked Indian meals everyday. For those of you who know me well, I am not big on spicey foods, but I feel like I am eating like a Queen in India and loving every bite. I am realizing that maybe I should have just written a food blog instead of a travel blog. Many of the highlights of Thailand, Cambodia and India have been the food! But I would not think twice about changing the food for the company and my lovely friends that I cherish.

I have many stories to share, but will write in more detail when I return to Bangkok. I leave for Delhi on Thursday. That should be fun. I will continue to post pictures. Love you all!

Loi Kathrong & My Bangkok Familia

The last two weeks have been a mish mosh of events. It has been a combination of cultural experiences, while trying to live in some sort of normalcy in Bangkok. After Cambodia, I decided that it would be good to start working out again. After I hurt my knee in New York, I kinda used it as an excuse to put off the work out routine. Well, it's four months later, and after submerging myself into many delicious food adventures from New York, Chicago, Thailand, to Cambodia, I decided it is time to take it easy and work on the waistline. Although, I must confess that I am addicted to mango sticky rice. I dream about it everyday. I have also indulged in the fried chicken with sticky rice and papaya salad that is sold every 50 feet on the side walk; this is also something that I should probably cut from the diet, but it is so. so good. And finally, the fried spring rolls...for only 6 baht each, how can you not want to eat four a day? Well, I am exaggerating...I've had them once a week, but even that is a lot of fried food when you mix in the fried chicken. After indulging in yummy, super delicious food, and seeing that the result is an expanding waist line, I decided to hit the gym. For the last two weeks, I have worked out for a couple hours a day, but aside from the gym, the Bangkok adventure has been about what happens after the workout.

On Monday, November 2^nd, we floated our worries away on a little banana leaf boat decorated with flowers, candles and incense. The Thai people celebrate Loi Kathrong, or the Festival of Lights on the night of the 12th full moon, which means that the dates changes from year to year, but is typically celebrated in November. It was originally a Buddhist ceremony, but is now celebrated throughout Thailand. The candles are a way to honor the Lord Buddha and the "floating away" of the banana boat leaf symbolizes the release of all the anger and worries of the previous year. It is a way of starting anew, which is always nice.

We began our Loi Kathrong celebration with dinner. Carla, Lisa, her husband, Federico, and I had a traditional Thai dinner at the local bar, Winks, and then headed to the festival. We each had our own offering and took a moment to cast off our negative energies and bad luck down the river. The most interesting part of the experience was the homeless individuals that took to the river and collected the money that was placed in the offerings. They were shivering, and yet they were turning over offerings to collect the change. It is quite striking when a traditional Thai holiday is treated so lightly by the less fortunate – it puts things into perspective.

Later that week we attended a Tango concert in the city. TANGO…dios mio. We were invited to the live show at the Siam Cultural Center by the embassy of Argentina. The concert was absolutely amazing. It was alive! I sat next to our friend Shirley, from Queens, NY, and after each song we turned to each other and simultaneously released a breathless “wow.” The most memorable part of the concert for me was the moment when I realized that I was in Bangkok listening to the most beautiful tango I have ever listened to in my life. In that instant I realized that it did not matter what country I was in and that what mattered was the moment and the experience. I have been very lucky to experience Thailand through my friends: through Carla that has been here for nearly five years and building her fashion career, for Lisa and her husband that are simply taking a chance in life and seeing what Bangkok has to offer, or for Shirley and Krystal who have come to teach and purposefully take themselves out of their comfort zone to try something different. Taking this time off has allowed me to strip the layers of stress and worry and really look at how I hope to life my life. I feel lucky and happy to have my Bangkok familia with me throughout my Southeast Asia trip. Thank goodness for them and this experience...and so it's back to working off all the yummy food adventures.